Everything I didn't say

As some of you may know, I have a small obsession with WFMU. It's gotten better since I moved across the country, but I still of course care. One show I listen to regularly is Seven Second Delay. I listened for years before getting up the nerve to call in. And I've done so several times since then.

Right before I moved they had a repeat theme - I'm blanking now on what it was called. But basically the two radio guys didn't say anything on air. You would just call up and talk. It was confusing so the first 10 minutes there was just this background stall music. And when you did call and get through you wouldn't really know it was you on the air until 7 or 15 seconds later when you'd hear your voice.

So, I got on and started talking. It was mostly nonsense. It was weird to sort of be the show. After what seemed like forever but was likely just 60 seconds I bowed out. And of course, I thought about all the things I could have said. Because people like to listen to what other people have to say. DJ's talk in between music and half of it is nonsense, but many people are interested despite that. Connecting to another human being? Only half listening? Not sure of the reason.

But what I wanted to talk about was which of the bugs I had in my house I hated the most, and what the listeners would think was the worst.

Here are (were) the choices:
- slugs
- roaches
- ants
- spider crickets

The problem is, each one is creepy and disgusting. But I guess my order of nastiness is this (from not so bad to the worst)
- ants
- slugs
- roaches
- spider crickets

Now, I'm not taking into account how easy it is to get rid of them. OK, well, on second thought, maybe I am.

A line of ants you can get rid of easily with a paper towel, and you can spray insecticide to get the ones in the corners, and leave out that sugar evil stuff so they bring it back home to kill. Slugs are gross and nasty and squishy and so killing them is gross and nasty. Yuck. Roaches laugh at you with their antennae and say 'ha, you can't kill me, and even if you can, I have 5,000 babies in your house that will carry on my legacy, and we'll show up in places and at times you least expect.' Shudder, but SMACK with a newspaper. But boy o boy, I cannot go after spider crickets. The problem is you don't know which way they're going to jump - it could be away from you or towards you. Roaches run away. Slugs can't run. Ants have tiny legs but they still run away. Spider crickets MAY jump towards you. And that makes them the worst.