Taking a mental health day today. My psychiatrist is making me do it - saw him yesterday. It's a good good thing. And apparently helping me come to terms with things. I dreamt of Billy last night. He had just finished eating and was cleaning up, and also laid down and rolled happily. Then later he jumped up on the bed and I was surprised I could feel his weight. I knew in the dream he was a ghost and was so happy to see him.
I did a radio show Wednesday night in honor of him. Remembering. And then later that evening figured out it was the anniversary of my mom's death. So felt guilty I didn't do anything for her. But honestly I think that was on purpose subconsciously. I didn't want to remember her death day. Her birthday is later this month and would rather remember that. But yes, I should do both.
It's interesting that people seem to be much more comfortable expressing sympathy about the death of my cat versus my mom. It's less scary I suppose. Certainly true of M. I appreciate it all.
So off to see flowers and have lunch with a friend. After exercising. All the shit I really have to do can come tomorrow - so out of my head dammit!