Friday, April 29, 2011

Recent books

Carrie Fisher: Wishful Drinking
Yes, that Carrie Fisher. Sardonic through and through. A couple times I laughed out loud, though it should have been more - again I read it too fast. Short and quick.

Gabriel Garcia Marquez: Memories of My Melancholy Whores
Really beautiful. A short read (115 pages). Because it's so short I hesitate to say much - a poet's take on aging and love.

Tana French: In the Woods
I wrote on FB after finishing this that sometimes I just want to read books that aren't like real life. Again, hard to explain without giving anything away. The first chapter was irritating because it was so flowery and unnecessary big words I thought, but then it calmed down and was well done.

Wednesday, April 27, 2011

Another sight

Since I was in open space area with the cattle, the border of it bordered some rather largely disgustingly big houses. See below.

Whew. And, they are right next to each other. Ugh.

I went to a networking-ish event tonight that focused on corporate social and environmental sustainability (mostly environmental). The best quote: Change. People like the noun, not the verb.

Unfortunately that is mostly true. It was interesting to hear the group of 4 men speaking. I must say thought that it irritates me when in some instances things (I think) should be better moderated/facilitated and they aren't. Makes me want to jump up and take charge. I did not this evening. All for the best.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Mooo oooM



the heavy weight of silence
light and carefree
golden sunlight through the glass
not to be
oppression, suppression, suspension
let's make lemonade

Sunday, April 24, 2011

Happy Easter!

Being away from home and family, I wanted some sort of traditional activity. Easter moved from being a religious holiday to a time to get together and have brunch, and that's what we'd do. I was going to have brunch with a friend, but it was sort of an up in the air thing, and it never landed to become reality. Which was fine.

So, I went to church. But I went to a Unitarian Universalist service. I think it's my first one ever. The church had the rainbow flag flying, inviting one and all to come worship. Wait, do UU's worship? Apparently they don't really believe in Easter.

I sat there somewhat bemused, but also interested, and laughed/smiled when we sang a song and jumped up and down from our seats like it was a football wave. I blinked when people clapped at the choir's beautiful singing (but also clapped).

I looked for some semblance of relation to a Catholic mass; oh, wait, they did pass around the offering plate... That sounds mean, but really, it was the only thing that really related but even then it was different, because they noted that if you were a guest no need to put anything in, and also had activity bags to pass out for the kids.

Then there were meditations (sort of like a sermon), which I liked. The best one was relating rising again to awakening, and how each of us can awaken to a new life, and live in this life to its fullest. A good credo.

As I walked home I smelled the roses.

I called my friend this morning to check on the brunch thing, and she had been in church (she is fairly Catholic). Told her that M had almost run over a bunny yesterday, and we were wondering if it would rise again for today. "Um, we don't call him Bunny." I just laughed and laughed. She said: "I've only been out of church for a half hour and I'm already irreverent; I'm trying to be holy for at least an hour. Bye!"

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Past, Present, Future

I used to be adamant about trying to stay friends with ex-lovers/boyfriends/husbands. Yet my ex is gone out of my life. Is it so bad? Perhaps a clean slate is a good thing.

Happy 4:20 ( a day after )

Had a friend in town for a couple days. Stopped by the Golden Gate Park and ran into a 4:20 celebration. Alas, no contact high. Hope you've been groovy.

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Slough it down

Went yesterday for my fun day since today I have to clean to prepare for the first visitor here (yay!). M was working, so off I went to a fun filled busy day.

First and main event was kayaking the Elkhorn Slough. Due to the tide circumstances (high tide 10:00 am) I got there when the place opened (9:00 am) and got out as soon as possible so I'd grab the lull time to go in and have the tide going out help me against the wind on the way out.

Turns out I was the first and only out for a while. Amazing. Below are some photos, but here's a list of adventures (be advised I'm using sea lion and seal interchangeably - when I shouldn't):
- piles of sea otters hanging out in the distance.
- piles of sea lions sunning on the beach.
- piles of seals barking on a pier.
- seals frolicking in the water
- sea otters frolicking with each other in the water.
- sea lion surfaces having caught a big fish. Throws it into the air enough to swallow it down.
- sea lion in the distance diving to get fish I assume, and slapping the water on the way down or up. The sound carries far! didn't know why he was doing it.
- seal babies with seal moms. One seal pup very curious about me and heads towards me. Big mom is nearby, and I decide to get away quickly. Another seal pup was too far away from its mom and it was calling and she was calling back.
- sea otters floating on their backs eating what they had caught. one otter had a really hard time getting open the shell. bang bang bang on the rock on its stomach multiple times.
- loons
- assorted other waterfowl.
- one bird had landed a good fish. Thin beak and the fish was sideways. Up on surface, wrong way. Went underwater to readjust, came back up and still not possible. One more time, then caught attention of a seagull. Damn freeloader tried to get the poor bird's fish and I accidentally got it on camera! Thankfully the bird had its day, and I saw the big fish in its narrow throat and then it was gone, in the stomach. woo hoo!
- small sea lion trying to figure out how to move on land. Wasn't doing too well...
- sea lion near my boat, accidentally. I didn't go away but I didn't paddle towards it. It stared at me for a while, and then dove. So I looked around, and then he surfaced over to the left, went under and slapped the water as he got up and looked at me. Went under and showed up a little closer and slapped the water. OK! got the message and went away.

Apparently the kayak company has a resident otter. He likes to sleep in one of the kayaks at night. The guy showed me the seat with the fur on it. Pretty funny.

OK, I'm saving the rest for other days. Procrastinating as it were....

Fog rolling in

Friday, April 15, 2011

Two more books

Last Night at the Lobster: Stewart O'Nan
Short small book. Wistful, kinda. Snapshot of a last shift on a closing Red Lobster. Good.

The Year of Magical Thinking: Joan Didion
Subjective and Objective analysis of grief and mourning after her husband dies. Really well done; intellectualized yet not.

Going to the library today. We'll see what I pick up.

Thursday, April 14, 2011


This morning I was woken up at 6:30 AM by verizon sending me a text message telling me I should sign up for one of their services. While I know there are plenty of people who have to get up at that time for work, I am not one of them. I called and told them never to call me again. I was polite though.

The other day a guy called me (asked for me by last name) and asked me to write a note and put it on a neighbor's door asking him to call that guy. Because I was in the middle of doing budget work and very very frustrated, I just asked the guy questions and asked why he wanted it, was he a creditor, etc. Very personal business he said. He gave me no information so I didn't do it. [I feel bad now, but still think there was something weird.] He got my name and number off the internet.

Late last week I heard a piece on the radio about a woman who has lived to 109. They said and I think I've heard it before that the ability to bounce back from life's issues seems to be a key factor. And a positive attitude. I wrote on FB yesterday, kinda as a joke, that I wish you could buy a positive attitude from a vending machine, but that I probably wouldn't have enough quarters.

I doubt I will live to 109. In the early part of my life I didn't acknowledge the feelings I had. Then I started acknowledging them and getting stuck in them. Now I'm still learning to get over them, but there's still a part of me that wants to wallow, how sad is that. I don't think I care about myself enough to decide to be happy. It shouldn't be for anyone else. It should be for me. Yeah yeah...

There's a part of me that kinda regrets giving close friends information about this blog. Especially when I get uninvited comments like 'you think too much'. I can't control the output of information for some people. And that's why I periodically go through FB and delete people that don't post anything/much and still have the ability to know what I'm doing. I regret it sometimes and if I really regret it I go back and ask the person to take me back, usually saying it was a mistake. Which, I guess it was.

BTW, I'm PMS-ing.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Physical proof

Lava rock

B2 bomber on drills (some kind of converted plane it's 'chasing'. I had run over to tell the kids, and the first question was, will they drop bombs? Oops... didn't think of the impact of my statement. It also looked scary to have it chasing a plane...)

Other strange drills going on.

Rainbow near Mono Lake

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

We interupt this with an important message

Well, no stories from the trip today. OK, well maybe tangentially.

On Thurs. evening I was apparently finally in phone range of a cell tower. The middle of the night I get the jingle that I had a message. I didn't listen until I got up the next morning. And there was my sister saying she had adventures with my mom. Meaning my mom's car had broken down and the police brought her to her realtor's and then she got home and never told my sister anything. I don't even remember how my sister found out. My mom was out of it when my sister talked to her.

So, there was a ton of emails back and forth (once I went to the local library where I was and signed up for a library card since I had to have one to use the computer and it was the only public computer in town) and ultimately she has surrendered her car. A huge transition for her, of course. Not made any easier by the fact that she thinks taxis are too expensive and the free shuttles are 'a pain' and she doesn't want to burden anyone - way to destroy any possible options. [now you know where I get my attitude from]. It will get worked out though, even if I have to smack her upside the head. Figuratively of course. I was glad that the 10 minutes I did researching car donations really helped.

And this morning I listened to myself and did not go to a networking breakfast. I just didn't want to go. Several young people who go are so friendly and I've talked with them about doing some follow up (mostly me getting stuff to them, or me asking from them politely), and NO RESPONSE. That irritates the hell out of me. I also didn't trust myself to say 'someone please give me any job you know of'. Yeah, no, I'm not that desperate, but sometimes I feel that way.

I had a dentist appointment and found out there that the very expensive night guard that was made for me where I used to live is not mine. The teeth mold they sent me was not my teeth (even though it had my name on it). So, now I have to deal with that office and either get my money back or get my real night guard. Oh well. I think the dentist here might be really nice and not charge me for today's appointment, though I said I was there for the 20 min and should be charged.

Speaking of medical stuff, I am finishing up my taxes and I had so many medical expenses last year that I easily went over the 7.5% cutoff for deductions. Joy? In any event, glad I had most of the receipts and can use it to get money back.

OK, work calls.

It was very interesting because between the time I talked to my sister on Friday and when I could actually get on email, I was so scattered. I went to a gas station and wanted to get a lottery ticket and couldn't communicate that well, forgot to pay for a small candy, forgot to take the candy with me, etc. Amazing how it affected me - I was quite stressed.

Monday, April 11, 2011


One early morning we went to the sand dunes. Important to get there early or late, otherwise it's HOT. Also important to get there when it's not windy, unless you have a lot of skin to lose. Thankfully it was not windy when we were there. The sand just past the parking lot is so fine it's incredibly soft. Later it becomes harder, but still feels good on the feet. The walk back was at times kinda hard on the feet because it was HOT. But it was so beautiful, and good exercise to boot - walking on shifting sand uses muscles that aren't often used.


I should be a model. Such long legs.

Two boys of the friends of ours walking along the dunes.

If you get there early enough, you see a lot of critter tracks. Such as these: Kangaroo rat tracks

One of the good quotes from the trip: we came across a lizard that was out in the sun. He ran into his little hole, and one of the boys looked down in, and then started shoveling sand into it. His mom: Stop that. He has a hard enough existence as it is without you making it harder.

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Shadow of the Valley of Death

We have returned! Escaped the shadow!

1,639 miles in a rented Chevy Traverse. Really a great car! Never thought I could say that about an American one, sadly.

571 photos with my new camera.

Great trip.

Friday, April 1, 2011

I have this up on my wall now - Happy Friday!

If I knew who drew it, I would buy the original. I love it that much.