Tuesday, May 28, 2013

You reached out for the one you tried to destroy

Happy Tuesday!  Had a great weekend. Hanging out, eating, a little climbing, beautiful weather, tide pools. Down by Morro Bay. If I weren't so lazy I'd upload a photo to here. Maybe later. And, oh, it turns out that it makes me more attractive to M if some other guy wants to date me. Interesting. My mantra with him is forgive but don't forget. So I'll have fun. But given my last year... there's a space deep inside that noone's getting to any time soon. If ever? There's a part of me that wonders if I should even be there, because therein lies insecurities and a different way of acting. If I am comfortable with myself and stand up for myself but am not obnoxious, then do I ever really open myself up for devastation? Not sure. How do you open yourself up but not lose yourself?

BTW, starting now to think about what 2 other friends and I are going to do for our 50th in 3 years... We're gonna do something fun!


laura b. said...

I think there is something in most of us that sees more value in something (or someone) that others want.
It is hard to keep opening yourself again, only to be hurt again. It can be so worthwhile...but I can't argue with the idea of protecting yourself.

Tara said...

I have a wall that I put up most of the time to prevent getting hurt, which is probably why it's difficult for me to meet someone. I'm only a little sad about that, though, until I get distracted and then I forget all about it.

Sometimes I do let my wall down and have met some really nice people.