I've been thinking that I just had way too much pride. Oh, I could be doing so much more I thought. Others thought so too. Yet that pride helped me get where I am. Got told there's no way I'll get a raise any time in the near future. And the next day was handed a written warning to go into my HR file.
So, I realize what I am, and I will work with it and not expect anything more. I will not be in this job forever, but right now I need it.
I had my third DBT appointment and I think it'll be good for me. Part of me rebels and says it's just Californians who can't deal with sharp east-coasters. But the skills I will learn will help I am sure.
So, I'm spending some of my savings to buy a new computer and am going to try and move forward with photography and such to make a little extra money and expand my horizons.
I am beaten down but am not broken.