So I briefly mentioned I am trying/tried match and OKCupid. Here's a list of things you may never think about, but seem to be prevalent here, and they kind of bleed into each other, so here's a stream of consciousness.
Open relationships: even if you are with someone, you can be with someone else but you don't have to tell about it. I am not sure how this differs from polyamorous, though I think for that there's a primary and secondary/ies. (Had one guy recently I would have loved to get to know. He's married and I'd see him a couple times in a month. I was tempted, I must admit.)
And then there are the people who are married who are allowed to have sex with others. (I've been hit on for that too.) There are indeed people who truly just want to bang someone else, but some are nice people and I can't see them maintaining a distance. One married guy I know I am so attracted to and he has an OK from his wife, but it's crap that it would only be about sex. He made out with some woman and his wife was VERY upset - I guess she watched Pretty Woman. Besides, I couldn't have it only be about sex. So where does that leave the non-married one?
And then the couples that want a third.... and swingers... and... and....
Now with these open relationships, half of them say they don't want someone with HSV. Which is such bullshit. I really don't think there's a good test for it. And there are people who don't know they have it, including YOU perhaps. So you are rolling the dice, and counting on people to be knowledgeable and honest.
I doubt very much that it's only in CA, but it's very open here for sure!
Oh,and then there's the spam. I fell for one once. So nicely written and cute photo. First email address they gave me turned out to be a woman. I wrote back and said that there was some problem, and he/it sent a new email address. I asked if he/it was spam, and he/it replied not spam and asked me to tell him/it more about himself/itself. But with horrible capitalization and punctuation. So I wrote back and said I'm a lonely lonely woman and that my mother needs surgery and could he/it please send me $5,000. To date I have received no reply.
I did get hit on last night by a supposed 23 year old. NFW.
I may become a monk.