Tuesday, December 21, 2010

Failure *is* an option

So, got dumped from my consulting gig yesterday. It sucks, and I cried a lot, but to be quite honest, I'm relieved. I was always waiting for the ax to fall. And it did.

I can beat myself up for failing, and I have a little. But I can also start understanding what my limitations are, and still feel good about myself. I'm doing pretty well on the first part, and taking minute baby steps toward the second. There's this me that I would love to be, but it's not me. If that makes sense. I have to accept what's me and move forward that, finding challenges within that realm. Or at least a job within that realm! I have a networking meeting this morning, and have a least learned what I'm not good at and can emphasize what I'm good at, and find something appropriate to my skills. I still thank the heavens that I did not get that Executive Director position. I would have been in over my head. But then again, I tend to swim or at least tread water when I jump into something. Except in this latest instance. And maybe a few other times. Oh well.

That and other things that happened yesterday have left me feeling quite battered. But the new year is coming, and with it new opportunities. I gotta believe, and do to a certain extent.


laura b. said...

I'm sorry. I guess that is the nature of consulting jobs...that would be a very difficult aspect to handle. I know you will find a situation that is perfectly suited to you.

And I know exactly what you mean about accepting the you that you are. I am working on that too.

3GirlKnight said...

Those who don't fail don't try.

Sorry about losing the job. Too bad you couldn't leave on your own terms. You'll be just fine though. Good luck!

Tara said...

The Executive Director position doesn't sound appealing to me. More money, I'm sure, but more stress too.

BrightenedBoy said...

Don't underestimate yourself.

The things that you "can't do" or "aren't good at" now might just be aspects of yourself you haven't mastered yet, signs of inexperience rather than inability.

Keep pushing and keep challenging yourself.

We all have many jobs in life. It'll be okay.

Hope you have a Merry Christmas!

Churlita said...

Drag! I hope you find the perfect job for you in the coming year.