Tuesday, June 5, 2012

One Second

I spent almost literally one and half hours writing a follow up email to the place I had heard nothing from and sent it Sunday night. When I got a reply Monday morning, I didn't want to read it. But, it turned out that they want me in for a second interview!  So that's great.

And contrast that with the huge overwhelming anxiety attack after work today.  I realized I had really screwed someone over by cancelling on my radio show. So when M picked me up to go somewhere, I started giving him all these directions because I was so anxious. Motoradvicemouth. Which of course is irritating. And then I started worrying that I hadn't been doing enough for my consultancy, and was taking advantage of the guy I'm working with. And then I kept hearing all the things M would say about his interpretation of what I do/who I am. These evil monkeys swirling around my head poking at me. An hour and a half of craziness, but I held it together mostly. I pulled myself back to the land of the living. I want to whine and get attention, but I'll just be an adult and get over it myself.

Sigh.

I'm headed up north for 4 days to spend time with my family and not see my nephew graduate from high school.  I return on Tuesday and he graduates on Wednesday... I needed to get back to make money, and I figured he has enough people there...





Not sure what kind of plant this is. A red mushroom?  It was in Yosemite at the base of a tree.


2 comments:

laura b. said...

Following up pays! So...I guess listening to the voices in your head is a very pick-and-choose proposition. Sometimes there is good advice there and sometimes it is just the white noise of anxiousness.
Have fun with your family, NoR.

Mel said...

Well--good news on the second interview. And good news that the moment passed and it was just a moment!

You're doing pretty dang good, all things considered. There are a few things on your plate, but one at a time, they're getting taken care of best you can.
Give yourself a bit of credit for that, eh?