Thursday, January 31, 2013

Moving forward, looking back

Did I write that I figured out I should say those things to myself in the sauna?  Be upbeat?  Make it so, so to speak? Well, I will.

The week flies by when  you have to work 8 hours a day. Imagine that...  I had glimpses today that I might not be happy with this long term.  How does it help disadvantaged people?  Uh, not much. Except me of course. Hm... have I ever mentioned that that's what I've done? Maybe not. Oh well.

I'm learning to rebound. My friend said that I am sometimes a funpyre.  Meaning I suck the fun out of people. Yeah, sounds nasty, but unfortunately I know he's right. Ugh. I mean, it's part of why M needed to leave. I think of it more like I  get stuck in this hole of yuckiness and people come near and it rubs off on them. Kinda like trying to bounce a ball on a sticky mat?  Not sure of the best comparison. But I understand, as my brother is that way. It's hard to have energy around him as he rarely has any and kinda sucks it out of you. I never ever thought I was the same, but I am sometimes. I can't hate my friend for saying it. Though, I didn't get him a card because of it. And, well, I"m a bit self conscious around him.

In any event, doing a show this weekend and it'll be fun. Gonna try music I never would listen to on my own, and see where it takes me.  Wheeee!!!!!

Believe it or not, but there's two cats there.


laura b. said...

If you aren't happy or don't feel fulfilled at your current job, you can always keep looking, right?

As for being a funpyre, I imagine that may have something to do with you being a serious-minded person. The thought that came to me was that when you are with people with a common goal (others in your field, rock-climbing companions) you don't suck the fun out of things at all! This is just a guess based on what I've seen over the years.

Anyway, have fun with your show :) And...does that picture mean Billy and your roommate's cat have learned to tolerate one another?

Mel said...

Two cats?! And they're not swatting the heck out of each other? Whoa.... LOL This is very good!

Sometimes we forget to relax and just BE where we are. Personally, not having to BE in the stressors might far outweigh being in them? Just my experience!

And people don't 'suck the fun' out of me. I don't let 'em. I suspect others have that choice, same as I do. If you don't like that attribute about you/them--you/them get to do some morphing..but as a person on the other side of YOU--I do have a choice in the matter of what I do with it. So pfffftt! LOL

Pamela said...

Those are my sister's cats...

Well, Laura, I can indeed suck the fun out. I have done it rock climbing... And sometimes Mel, people just wait for you to get over it, as there are other good things about me worth sticking around after the soul is sucked out.

Tara said...

I do see two cats, now that you mention it! I see the ears on one and the eyes on the other.

Sometimes I feel self conscious around a few of my friends. One tends to correct my English on occasion while I'm trying to tell her a story, and then I feel inferior. I don't like that feeling.