Sunday, August 9, 2009

Back and alive

This whole week is likely going to be my vacation adventures... I'm back and survived the trip AND the meetup with internet radio man. I'm starting to feel tired, which is good since I have jet lag. I was a bit nervous out there as one day I slept until 10:00 am Pacific time, but we'll see.

I'm mostly being contemplative at the moment. It was so good to get away, it was amazing. Vacations are a good thing.

I read Witch of Portobello by Paulo Coehlo on the way back. It's kinda a female version of Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah which I've talked about before. One line (amongst many) that stuck out for me was "you are what you believe yourself to be."

It's funny - I started this blog as a way to just vent about life, and to remind myself to live life with no regrets. And this past vacation I certainly did the latter.

I really thought about it as I was sitting trying to get out a question to Exhibit A, who I had talked about before. We got along really well, and after day one of climbing I forced myself to awkwardly ask what was the deal - ie was he interested in me, if so, why didn't he try to kiss me, etc. He looked like a cornered puppy dog and couldn't really answer me. So I let him be and went to get ready for bed. He came in and gave me a hug and a quick kiss, and said yes.

Now, I am really glad I asked even though it almost killed me to do it and I was beet red asking it. I seriously thought to myself - I'm supposed to be the woman with no regrets so I *have* to do this. It led to a nice couple days, but will likely lead no further since there is a distance issue...which makes me sad. But I'm happy I did it.

And now hunger is overtaking me and I MUST eat. I will tell more stories later.


Ananda girl said...

Good for you! I admire bravery. I am such a chicken... you will be my inspiration. :)

I am glad that you had a wonderful time. Its good to challenge yourself. Great when you win. Welcome home.

laura b. said...

I will think of that story next time I am wondering...should I?

Can't wait to hear all about your vacation adventures!

Churlita said...

I had a similar experience with different results, but still good. The guy I asked had a lot going on with a really sick son, so he said he couldn't be in a relationship right now, but he still texts and messages me and I think we'll be friends. At least I know where he stands and I won't have expectations that won't ever be met anymore. I think it's always worth the risk. If nothing else, just to know.

is there anyway you could move there or he could move where you live?

Susan said...

I do love stories about kisses. MORE kisses stories!

Tara said...

Maybe next time it'll be easier for you to approach that kind of topic, whether it's with him or someone new. You rock, I would've been petrified too!

Pamela said...

Ananda, I try and try... Thanks for the welcome home!

Laura, I steeled myself for it not working out - that might be the trick.

Churlita - yeah, I saw your blog. Funny how it happened to both of us. And yes, I needed to know. He would never move here - he's addicted to that area. I could move there, but it would have to be for more than him - we don't really have a relationship per se, just the potential for one.

Susan, alas, I'm not really one to kiss and tell. sorry... I will say it was equally as awkward as my question - a quick thing and then gone.

Tara, I doubt it would be easier. Jeez, it was rough!

Susan said...

DUDE. Was the kisser the "mysterious" picture? If so my bags would be PACKED

Pamela said...

No, the tree sniffer. I can set you up with the mysterious man if you want!! I think you'd like him.

Squirrel said...

Wow... I'm really glad you asked too! Your story makes my day.

Pamela said...

Squirrel, why does it make your day??

Squirrel said...

It makes my day because I love to hear stories about friends being courageous.