Tuesday, November 11, 2008

I have noone to call

So I have to write out to you all. Weeping in my office. Will these fucking emotions never get stabilized? I'd so rather be happy high all the time. It's not happening any time soon, or even again, since that's why I'm taking the medication.

16 comments:

heather said...

i haven't experienced what you're going through first hand but i've watched j go through it.
whatever you do, make sure you keep your doctor up to date on how you're doing. ~honestly~ 'i'm fine doesn't cut it.'
consider yourself hugged. you're a braver woman than you know and you'll get through this.

NoRegrets said...

Thanks much. Jeez, I could use a real hug.

Susan said...

Here have some of mine from yesterday

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(too tiny for the word "hug" in there)

M. Robert Turnage said...

Hang in there. You have a lot of friends on blogland and you have people who care about you.

On really bad days, I listen to nothing but Motown. Sometimes it helps.

NoRegrets said...

Ah, Susan, always ready with your cervix... what a woman. thanks!

MRT - i'm hanging by my fingernails at this point. thanks...
Motown... I've never really connected with that music, but I could try again.

Tera said...

Okay you ready???

((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))

That big enough for you? :)

M. Robert Turnage said...

Try these songs in this order:

(songs to work out the negativity)

Ball of Confusion (That's What the World Is Today)

Nowhere to Run

The Tears of a Clown

The Tracks of My Tears

(song where you feel a little bit of hope)

Reach Out (I'll Be There)

(songs that get you hoppin')

Mickey's Monkey

Get Ready

Dancing in the Street

Ain't No Mountain High Enough

Then you round it out with Gloria Gaynor's "I Will Survive."

NoRegrets said...

Thanks much, Tera. Now that's a big hug.

MRT, that's a good playlist. I just need to make it into a mixed cd...
Meatloaf's bat out of hell does something similar for me.

Churlita said...

I'm all about escapism and comfort. Movies on the couch with a comforter. Although, last night I was stressing out about money and my girls were at their dad's house, so I listened to music and cooked a sh*@ ton of food. I guess it all depends on my mood and it changes rapidly, apparently.

NoRegrets said...

I'll try and do something like that tonight. Though for me it might mean using my Target gift card to buy something I want, like some bowls...

Mrs. Hairy Woman said...

I hope you get through this .. You are not ALONE .. You have all of us here in Blog world..
(((((((((((HUGS))))))))

Glamourpuss said...

Ah yes, I miss the hgihs, too - don't really want to give them up.

Puss

NoRegrets said...

Thanks Mrs. I appreciate it mucho

Puss..and I just have a mild case so they weren't all that high, but I'll still miss them...

laura b. said...

Geez, there are days I could (and probably have) written that post. But it does help to get it out there, doesn't it?

Mel said...

*hugshugsandmorehugs*

k.....I know it sucks.
I know that 'medium ground' doesn't look too inviting--having someone trying to help you discover what 'normal' looks and wears like....doesn't necessarily 'feel warm and fuzzy'. I remember screaming "I don't WANNA FREAKING BE NORMAL"

Who wouldn't 'like' being on the ecstatic side of life.
But it's a package deal (dangitall...).
Really....finding a balance means the loss of something that's miserable and debilitating (for some).

You're doing it--even when you feel like you're not, you are.
Inches and seconds, yaknow?
You'll get there....

(and DO tell the doc about the degree of 'low' you're having?)

NoRegrets said...

So, Laura, sorry to hear you could have written that post... want to guest write a post and see if anyone notices?

Mel - I did tell, and we didn't up the meds just yet, in response to all this. I am a very sensitive gal when it comes to meds, appparently.