Monday, January 7, 2008

Triumvirate


There was a time in my life when I split my life into three pieces with respect to men. I had three men in my life covering three different set of needs, and none of them was my boyfriend - I didn't technically have a boyfriend at the time.
Guy #1: Ex who I couldn't disconnect from in part because of a weird dynamic and my low self esteem, and with whom I did outdoorsy type activities.
Guy #2: Ex who I didn't want to completely disconnect from with whom I had a good friendship and great sex.
Guy #3: Married guy who I connected emotionally/intellectually with, with whom I never had sex.

I sometimes try to psychoanalyze myself and wonder what that meant. Simply screwed up? Takes more than one man to satisfy me? So lacking in self confidence/need so much attention I have to get it from multiple men? I still wonder sometimes.

In the end, I managed to get rid of guy #1. Guy #2 and I connected whenever both of us were available. We did try to date again, and it just didn't work. I had dumped him the first time, and he dumped me the second, so we both had turns. Guy #3 realized that he couldn't/shouldn't be that close to someone who wasn't his wife, and so we stopped intense contact.

5 comments:

Susan said...

Dear, if I start going into all the men I have in my life and roles they play I would go crazy. I think it's natural for a part of us to always want something more. Have more men can fix this problem..

Belle - A Beauty livin with her Beast said...

i think we see qualities that we want in one man in many men, so we keep all of them around to satisfy what we cant find in one person. so if you ever find the good qualities in a perfect man, please ask if he has a brother...hahaha

NoRegrets said...

Hmm... so either I"m not crazy, or both of you are crazy like me. :-)

Churlita said...

I think that everyone does that in some way. There isn't one person who meets all of our needs. We just have to find someone who comes close.

NoRegrets said...

Yeah and figure out what coming close really means.