OK, so are women genetically programmed to want to please, or is it just me? The old nature vs. nurture thing. There's a reason I was Remus in the quiz - because I do try to adapt myself to please others, especially men. It slapped me in the face all day yesterday (boy were my cheeks red). As part of our work together, my husband's homework was to figure out what his needs and wants are. We got together on Independence Day and talked. And saw fireworks. Did not create any though (both good and bad).
So anyway, on Thursday I was a jumble of emotions because even as early as Wednesday night I was forgetting my needs and concentrating on his - willing to throw mine out with the bathwater. Crap crap crap is what it is. So I was angry at myself, angry at him, and since all good therapists say that anger is just a secondary emotion, I should say I was scared, hurt, confused, and likely more. Arg. Thankfully I had a double dose of therapy yesterday - my own, and the couples therapy. Wee ha - better living through therapy. And I need to keep it in mind for all my relationships.