Candy Bars

An email conversation between me and some computer geek regarding installing some vending machines at the office:

Him to entire staff:
Be careful, you don't want to hire any Goobers to install that thing. You should talk to either Clark, Mr. Big, or Mr. Goodbar on 5th Avenue (but only After Eight) I understand any of them would do it for 100 Grand. One tip: smear a Bit 'O Honey on the floor before sliding it back, otherwise it might Breakaway. If you get it stuck, you might be able to pry it loose with that, um, Whatchamacallit you know, a Wonka Bar.

Me to him:
Oh Henry! Kudos to you for the Mounds of ideas. I've also heard the Girl Scouts have a group, the Junior Mints (leader whose nickname is Peppermint Patty), who will, 'twix and 'tween their cookie selling, be willing to move stuff (they may offer the whole group, but I'd suggest to only Take Five.). Their Payday has traditionally been Friday. Don't pay them too much though! You might get a reputation for being a Sugar Daddy, with tons of Sugar Babies.