So, Friday night I met up with a guy I had exchanged emails with on the free online dating site I signed up with. This whole experience has been interesting - from writing a profile to interacting via email to meeting up in person. I find it very odd, but it has made me feel like I'm actually doing something to meet new people rather than sit on my ass and whine about how few friends I have to do things with. A small something, but something. Though I must say, I don't think it's going to fulfill my desire to find a rock climbing partner. Alas. And at least with this particular service, someone who could serve as a partner period.
Interesting note: About half the guys who have written to me are black. Which is odd, because they can't see my behind in the photo. You already know I have small boobs, given that I always forget my bra and it doesn't matter, but I do apparently have an interesting behind. I have gotten comments from a number of black men when walking around my work. Actually, to continue to toot my own horn today, I'm wearing a new dress (from Goodwill) that makes me look like I have boobs, so I should go for a walk ;-).
Anyway, the guy I met Friday evening is black. Nice guy and all. But boy, I'm not quite sure he's straight. On the continuum of heterosexuality to homosexuality, I think he's somewhere in the middle. Not sure he knows it either. But anyway, it was interesting to meet someone in a bar who I had never met before, and chat for an hour or so. And know that I really don't want to interact with him anymore. And don't have to.
That was the initial problem with this whole thing. See, I like to be considerate. And to me, interacting with someone often means I accept some responsibility for doing that. Even someone who writes a small email to me saying "I like your smile. How are you doing?". And I like to give people chances - finding the good in people. But I can't do that with this online dating thing - I'd get caught up in being nice and feeling like I had to meet someone and spend all my time with people I don't want to be with. So, it's a learning experience to listen to my gut, make quick decisions, be open about what I don't want (Thanks for writing and the compliment, but not interested), and not take myself or the writer too seriously.
One good thing that came out of it is that he thought I looked a lot younger than I am. But does that really count if the guy saying it is 50? Joke.
Yeah, I think I'll go for that walk.
[Note after walking: OK, I tried out that toot my own horn persona, and just can't do it. Yucky. I'll go back to my usual self deprecating self]
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8 comments:
Congrats on trying the whole adventures in online dating thing! I hope you do find someone you can go rock climbing with! Ya never know. Somewhere there's a guy blogging about how hard it is to find a woman to go rock climbing with, and then bam, you meet each other online.
When I tried a free online dating site, I got some black guys interested too and a few weirdos who wanted to get busy that same night.
T and I met through an online dating site. During the 9 months when I was on the site, I found that I was happiest when I stopped thinking about it as a dating service and instead treated it as a way to meet interesting new people.
yes, Tara, you never know, but I won't hold my breath... I haven't gotten the 'get busy the same night' weirdos, but at least I have a good excuse - hey, want herpes?
Squirrel, yeah, I know. Jeez, though 9 months to find someone good? Actually, which is fine, since I really dont want anyone right now.
I've kicked it around, but it's hard here in such a small town. I've been trying without a dating service for the last two years, so 9 months sounds like nothing. And those guys who are just trying to get busy are idiots. Women who join dating sites, are looking for relationships, if all we wanted to do was get busy, we could pretty much just show-up somewhere and find that. Duh, that's what it's like to be female.
There was this Three's Company episode where Jack and Janet both applied to a dating service and they got matched to each other, but they didn't know it was each other because they used pseudonyms. Janet's pseudonym was "Daisy." This is the closest I have come to a dating service.
My life is sad.
Your life is not sad - you are married to an attractive intelligent woman.
haha! The stories we could tell about online dating, right? Like Squirrel did, I try to just think of it as a way to meet new people. Sure haven't made a love connection yet...
If you are looking for dating partner, there are many online dating sites available. Don't hesitate try at least once online dating services. I am sure it will nice experience for you.
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